It is ok to guide, lead, 5 ways to tell when a redhead is angry 1 She’s silent 2 She’s yelling 3 She’s acting the same 4 She’s acting different 5 She kills you shirt etc. But it’s not ok to try to live your life through your child or force them to achieve a certain thing. Just love them and let them develop. I love how people on this post are putting words in my mouth. Never ever did I say or insinuate that I do that. Everything you said is important, guide, set example, encourage and set rules. I think the message is not saying the contrary. The challenge is to do all those things without breaking the children own being. Let them express, and accept them as they are even when they don’t follow “our” path. Our job is to teach them values, provide opportunities and let them develop their own self. Then do the same for there children.